... And Now I'm Jewish

This past Friday, my last two years of work and studying culminated in an official ceremony, converting me to the Jewish faith. I already presented my statement to the congregation, but decided to put it here as well, for anyone else who may be interested in reading it. My mom even came out for my ceremony, which was awesome.

Conversion Statement- Why Did I Convert?

            In Rabbi Bach’s last service before the New Year, he shared with us that currently one in four people are identifying themselves as “nothing,” or “none” in terms of religion. For most of my life, this label applied to me. My parents felt deep dissatisfaction with their spiritual upbringings, and so didn’t raise me in any religion, wanting different for me. While I know why they did this, it caused me lots of confusion over the years. In a world full of science and proof and fact, was there a higher power? Where did I belong? I felt alienated from the spiritual world, having no understanding of it and no idea where to begin. I had had some encounters with Christianity, but they left me feeling uncomfortable and alone. These experiences had me feeling even more out of place than ever, so for most of my teenage and young adult life, I preferred to defer to the “nothing” category.

My first experiences with Judaism were the bat mitzvahs of my friends Erin and Melissa in 2002. Even though I had never previously been involved in any Jewish ceremony or worship, I felt a sense of belonging and understanding for the first time there in that synagogue. But it would be nine more years before that calling would really make sense to me, and pull me in a definite direction. In that time, I completed my education, got married and moved out of the safety and security of my parents’ home. I think that’s when the “nothing” label started to not be good enough for me anymore. I was now in the adult world, no longer a teenager who knew everything. As J.R.R Tolkien tells us in Lord of the Rings, “Nothing is certain; some things ARE certain.” What had become certain to me was that there was a higher power in the world, though it made little sense to me.

            Then, several years ago, my friend Maggie converted to Judaism from the church. I didn’t know one could do such a thing. Her dedication and perseverance encouraged me to seek out a temple where I might explore Judaism for myself, remembering the community and belonging from the bat mitzvahs so many years before. There were no temples in Oklahoma, where my husband and I were first stationed in 2010, so I was forced to wait until March of 2011 when we first arrived here in El Paso. I contacted the temple office, and they helped me set up a meeting with Rabbi Bach. His instructions before our first meeting were easy enough: attend one of the services that weekend. And in only one service, I knew I was where I truly belonged. I can’t entirely put it into words, but I just KNEW. Now that’s not to say it’s been an easy journey since then, reconciling my life before Judaism with my current sense of spirituality. It’s taken a lot of time, learning, soul searching, and mostly, lots of praying (which I had never done before). But now I know where I belong, what I believe, who I am. I have found my home as a Jew. Our prayer book reads, “May the doors of this synagogue be wide enough to receive all who hunger for love, all who are lonely for friendship. May it welcome all who have cares to unburden, thanks to express, hopes to nurture… May this synagogue be, for all who enter, the doorway to a richer and more meaningful life.” And for me, it is.

And now that it’s official, you all can start charging me. Thank you.